


Consequences (Roman angst)

by Fandom_Girl_8D



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Needs a Hug, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:41:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24703963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandom_Girl_8D/pseuds/Fandom_Girl_8D
Summary: This is story that I came up with in the middle of the night, but I'm kinda proud of so decided to post it on here. Enjoy!TRIGGER WARNING:Self-HarmCuttingBloodSuicide attemptSlight depressive thoughtsDon't read if any of this will trigger you.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 82





	1. Chapter 1

Roman, Patton and Thomas were making a video, everything was fine until the snake showed up.

"We can't trust him, he's asking us to go back on things we've known for years, rights and wrongs, shoulds and shouldn'ts, how can we trust him?!" Roman said.

Deceit sighed and everyone looked at him, "I don't have a simple answer to that question," Deceit sighed again, looking hesitant and unsure, "But here's a start," he said beginning to remove his glove, "my name..." he removed his glove and put his hand up, "my name is Janus..." He said. 

Everyone was shocked, Especially when Roman started laughing, "pfft- Janus?" he laughed, glancing back at Patton to see if he too was laughing, he wasn't in fact he looked horrified, but Roman didn't stop, "What are you, a middle school librarian? It's a stupid name." 

Janus looked hurt and angry, "Oh, Roman, thank God you don't have a mustache," Janus started, and Romans smile immediately began to fall, "otherwise, between you Remus, I wouldn't know who the evil twin was." Janus retorted.

Those words cut deep, Roman looked at Patton and Thomas but neither tried to stand up for him, instead, they looked away, unable to make eye contact, "are you guys seriously going to take his side" Roman asked, his voice pained. Thomas started to say no but Roman spoke over him, "over me?" he asked, Patton started to say something but Roman ignored him and kept talking, "Thomas...I thought I was your hero..." Roman said, recalling what Thomas had said a few years back, the thing he'd remind himself off whenever the thoughts and insecurities started to become to much to bare, the same thoughts and insecurities that now threatened to engulf him.

"Y-you are!" Thomas replied quickly, surprised Roman remembered that.

Roman glanced over at Janus, silently asking if Thomas was lying, Janus nodded, confirming that he was, Roman broke, "wow, I can't believe this, did you forget that he's evil?!" Roman asked, directing the rest of his words at himself, as he tried to hold back the tears, "you're not, or..you're not supposed to be your supposed to be good! You can't-" 

"Roman," Patton said gently, cutting him off, "everything's gonna be ok, Kiddo. We love you." 

Roman just scoffed, "Right..." he sunk out into his room, locking the door with a wave of his hand. His heart felt like it had been ripped to shreds, he just broke down as the conversation repeated in his head, eventually just turning into a loop of "evil twin" and "not his hero." until he was nearly convinced that, if he were to look in his mirror, he'd see his brother instead of himself. 

So he pushed himself to his feet and stumbled over to the full length mirror in the corner, his gaze falling to the floor as he walked, eventually just closing his eyes all together. Once he was in front of the mirror, he counted to three and opened his eyes, looking up at his reflection, he gasped, though it was more of a sob, and fell back when he saw his twin standing there. 

If he had been thinking clearly he would have realized that he was so convinced that was what he'd see that he influenced the mirror to show him just that, it was a magic mirror owned by the embodiment of creativity after all. 

Roman sobbed heavily, not even hearing when Patton knocked on his door. Roman felt a sharp pain from his arm and looked down to see that he had summoned a knife and made a pretty deep cut. He made another and another, overcome by sadness and self-hatred. 

By the time he heard a second knock on his door and a voice call: "open up, princey!" both of my arms were covered in deep cuts and there was a large pool of blood on the floor. His ears were ringing and he felt dizzy and lightheaded, he knew that was too many cuts, too much blood, bbithe didn't really care. 

He fell back into the floor with a soft 'thump'. He could hear the door being broken down, and someone mumbling something, then a gasp and a scream and everything went silent. 

~~~~~ 

Written: 6-13-2020  
Word count: 733


	2. Chapter 2

Virgil had just returned from playing just dance with Remus, and was now trying to listen to his music, but a knock on the door made him pull his headphones back off, "what?" he called annoyed, the door opened to reveal Patton who was clearly trying not to look worried. 

"Patton? What's wrong?" Virgil asked. Patton started to say something about a video and Roman but Virgil couldn't understand him, "slowly, from the beginning, what happened."

Patton took a deep breath, "me, Thomas and Roman were making a video, because Thomas was upset after the wedding earlier. Everything was fine until Janus showed up-" 

"Deceit?!" Virgil asked angrily.

"Yeah, anyway he revealed his name, Roman made fun of it, then Janus retaliated by comparing Roman to Remus and calling him evil, and then Roman sunk out. I went to check on him but his door was locked and he didn't answer, but I could hear him crying." Patton explained.

Virgil wasn't too worried, I mean, he knew Roman was insecure about Remus and all but he'd be fine, even still, Patton was worried so he'd at least make Roman talk to him. 

When they got to Romans door Virgil knocked, "open up, Princey!" he called through the closed door, then he heard a 'thump' from inside, as if Roman was sitting on the floor and fell over, immediately Virgil felt anxious, he knocked louder, but no answer there was no sound at all from inside the room, "I'm going to break down the door," he told Patton who stepped back, Virgil rammed into the door and it broke down rather easily.

"I hope Romans ok..." Patton said worryingly. 

Virgil stepped into the room but at first didn't see anything, he looked to his right and gasped. He tried to prevent Patton from seeing but it was too late, Patton screamed and fell to the floor. Virgil ran over to Roman, who lay un-moving in a pool of blood, his arms were both covered in deep cuts, Virgil couldn't tell how bad they were because of the blood. 

He quickly picked up Roman and sank out into the living room. Thomas was sitting on the couch, still in his suit, but he jumped to his feet when Virgil entered the room. 

He started to greet him but then he saw Roman, "w-what happened?!" Thomas asked.

Ignoring his question Virgil lay Roman down on the couch before turning to Thomas, who was freaking out, "I need you to summon Logan," he told him but it didn't look like he was listening, he was staring at Roman. Virgil could tell he was blaming himself for this, for some reason, but he needed to get his attention and there was no time to calm him down, so instead he slapped his, not hard enough to hurt him, just hard enough to get his attention, "you need to summon Logan!" he told him more urgently this time, Thomas nodded, still in shock and did as told.

Logan rose up, "what do you wa-" he stopped abruptly, eyes wide, and looked behind Virgil, "Patton, I need you to get water, a wash cloth and a hand towel," he orderered, Virgil hadn't even noticed Patton rise up. Patton ran off to grab the things Logan asked for while Logan summoned bandages and disinfectant.

Once Patton returned, Logan wet the wash cloth and began to clean away the blood, soon everyone could see the cuts more clearly, then were really deep, and Virgil notices scars under the open cuts. Once the blood was as cleaned away as possible, the cuts were still bleeding, Logan used the towel to stop the bleeding, which took a while, then disinfected the cuts and wrapped his arms with bandages. When he was finished he turned to look at the others, "Now, what the hell happened?!" 

Thomas explained what Janus had said, and what he'd said, then Patton and Virgil explained about finding Roman. Both Patton and Thomas were blaming themselves, and while Virgil agreed that they should have stood up for Roman, he was more mad at Janus. They all knew that Roman was insecure about being compared to Remus, even Thomas had an idea after their talk at the end of dwit. 

Of course none of them knew Roman was feeling like this, even though, looking back, it was so obvious. Virgil sunk out, appearing in Janus' room.

"Remus, I already told you, no more deodorant this week, I'm not going to change my mind on that." Janus said, not even looking up from the book he was reading. 

"It's not Remus." Virgil said.

Janus looked up at him, shocked to see him there, "Virgil? What are you doing here?" Janus asked, genuinely surprised to see him.

"Why the hell would you compare Roman to Remus?! He almost killed himself because of what you and Thomas said! Stay away from my family!" Virgil shouted angrily. 

Janus was shocked, "H-he what?" 

"You heard what I said, he almost died and it would've been all your fault!" Virgil shouted, "if you ever go near my family again, I'll kill you myself," he threatened.

Janus sat in shock, Roman almost ended his life? Because of what he'd said? And he couldn't even apologize? He had hurt the side he liked that badly and all he'd done was make fun of his name... He had to apologize, he'd wait a few day's though, he didn't want to make things worse. 

Virgil sunk into Remus' room.  
Remus looked up when he arrived, quickly hiding something behind his back, "oh, it's you. What is it, emo? You get kicked out of the light sides?" Remus asked.

"It's Roman, he tried to kill himself..." Virgil told him.

Remus whole demeanor seemed to change as soon as Virgil said that, from crazy, and well, Remus-y, to scared and concerned for his brother. "Where is he?" he asked seriously. 

"Thomas' living room," Virgil replied. 

Remus immediately sunk out and Virgil followed. Everyone was sitting still gathered on the couch, watching Roman. Remus, went and sat on the floor in front of the couch, Virgil took usual spot on the stairs, they all waited for Roman to wake up.

~~~~~

Written: 6-13-2020  
Word count: 1,051


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing Roman realized as he began to wake up was that his arms hurt like hell, the next was that he could hear people talking, though he couldn't tell who it was, the third was that he was on the couch, and the fourth was the memory of what he'd done. 

He would most likely have died if it weren't for Virgil breaking into his room. He couldn't decide whether he was glad Virgil had saved him or not. 

One thing he knew for sure: he did not want to face the others right now, or ever really, so he just kept pretending to be unconscious.

He listened to Logan and Patton's conversation, they were discussing how to help him, "we need to watch him twenty-four seven, we can't risk letting him be alone." Logan said. Romans breath hitched at that, never getting to be alone? That sounded awful!

"I think he heard you," Virgil said.

Oh great, of course he'd be watching close enough to see if Romans breathing changed. Well there's no point in continuing to pretend to be unconscious. He opened his eyes, looking around a bit, before spotting Remus and instantly sitting up, scrambling away from him, the pain in his arms increasing at the movement. 

"Wow, calm down, Roman. Remus isn't going to hurt you, he's here because he's worried about you." Thomas said. 

But Roman didn't calm down, he just stayed there looking uncertainty between Remus, Thomas and Patton. 

Virgil noticed this and walked towards him, "Princey, we all just want to help you."

Roman could tell Virgil was being sincere, he relaxed a bii but was still cautious of Remus. Last time he saw Remua he hit Roman over the head with his morning-star. 

Virgil sat down next to Roman, pulling him into a light hug, Roman leaned into him, burying his face in his chest and crying again. He felt so pathetic, but at this point, all he wanted was to feel safe, for the thoughts that still filled his head to just leave him alone already, to be happy, even if he looked pathetic in the process. 

Soon he felt another pair of arms wrap around he, then another, soon they were all hugging him, it actually felt nice. Maybe a little too nice because he started to fall asleep, though that may have partially been because of blood loss.

~

A few days have passed and Roman was feeling a bit better, he had become a bit more open about how he felt, especially with Virgil. 

Roman was in his room, thankfully he wasn't the only one to disagree with Logan's idea that he had to be watched all the time. 

There was a knock at the door, "come in!" he called, expecting it to be either Patton or Virgil, they checked on him the most, but instead in walked Janus. 

Roman opened his mouth to tell him to get out but something about his appearance stopped him, he walked in and hesitantly sat at the edge of Romans bed, far enough away that Roman didn't feel threatened by his presence. 

"Roman..." He started, but it seemed as if he didn't quite know what to say, "I wanted to apologize, I shouldn't have said what I did, I never wanted to hurt you, I just got angry and- I'm sorry." He said. 

Roman stared at him, even he could tell Janus was telling the truth, that he felt guilty for what he'd said and that he, like Patton and Thomas, blamed himself for what happened. 

"It's ok," Roman told him out of habit.

"No it isn't! I hurt you and you almost- I pushed you over the edge!" Janus said loudly. "I would never forgive myself if you had actually died, I still don't think I can. I know you aren't like Remus, and that neither one of you are evil. And I wish I never said that." 

Janus stopped, looking up to make eye contact, "I care about you, a lot, and I want to help you get better, I'm here for you if you ever need anyone to talk to." And with that, Janus left. 

~

Later that night Roman found himself standing outside of Janus' door, knocking. The door opened, "I forgive you, Janus, and I know you don't always lie, I trust you." Roman told him. He'd been thinking about it all day and had realized that, if he could forgive Thomas and Patton, then he could forgive Janus. 

Janus was so happy that he hugged Roman, who was surprised but didn't pull away from him. Romans heart skipped a beat, he felt butterflies in his stomach and started blushing as soon Janus touched him. 

After a few seconds Janus released Roman, "s-sorry, I, uh.." he trailed off, he too was blushing.

"I should probably be getting back before someone notices I'm gone and flips out. I'll see you around, Janus!" Roman said quickly, as an excuse to get away quickly. 

He ran off around the corner, hearing Junus say: "y-yeah, see you later." sounding a bit sad.

Before he sunk back into his room, 'do I like Janus?' Roman thought about him more and his heart skipped again, he also felt lighter. 'I do like him!' he realized.

Before he could think anymore about it his door opened and Patton popped his head in, "We're having a movie night, Kiddo!" he announced cheerfully. 

"Alright, I'll be out in a bit," Roman said.

Patton left and Roman put on his onesie before going down to the living room, actually skipping a bit. 

"What's got you all happy?" asked Virgil, "don't get me wrong, I'm glad you're in a good mood, just wondering what brought it on." 

Roman just shrugged, turning to Patton, "can we invite Janus and Remus to join?" he asked. 

Everyone was surprised Roman'd want Janus there, "Why Janus?" asked Virgil again.

This time Roman answered him, "he apologized to me earlier and I forgave him." Roman said simply. 

Virgil looked like he wanted to say something more but Patton spoke up first, "of course we can invite them!" he sunk out returning a few moments later with the dark sides in tow, both were in onesies which was a surprise. Janus looked adorable in his. 

They all got situated, Janus and Roman somehow ending up next to each other. Same with Virgil and Logan. Patton just sat by himself on the floor. 

It was a bit awkward at first, since Roman and Junus kept getting pushed closer together, but eventually they just gave in to the closness and started cuddling.

~~~~~

Written: 6-13-2020  
Word count: 1,118

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this short story!  
> I definitely enjoyed writing it, especially the Roceit part.


End file.
